


Moves Across the Land

by SamCyberCat



Category: Free!
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-22
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-08-16 17:20:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8110897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamCyberCat/pseuds/SamCyberCat
Summary: Before Makoto passes away he writes a letter to each of his friends. Now that he's gone, they all begin to receive these letters, with Kisumi being the first and Haru being the last.





	1. Letter to Kisumi

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea lurking around for a while, so I thought I'd start writing it as a casual break between working on other projects. Each chapter features a different character receiving a letter from Makoto. This is set a few years post-ES, but not too many. Unfortunately Makoto died young in this story.

In general, Kisumi was very good at distracting himself from thinking about anything he didn't want to think about. That was basically how he got through life. Because if he ever stopped too long to think about everything then he'd be swallowed up by it all and that wouldn't fit his image as the cheerful basketball player who was everyone's friend.

But sometimes he just couldn't switch it all off, no matter how hard he tried. And Makoto's death had been... well, it had been too much.

He knew that he had to pull himself together eventually. His employers had been lenient, but there was no doubt that he'd lose his job if he didn't turn up to work sometime in the near future. Even so, whenever he tried to get up from the sofa the image of Makoto's smiling face would surface, spiking through him like the worst stab to the gut, and render him stuck there once again. This had gone on for days. Even his parents had given in to concern and phoned, asking if he felt that having Hayato over would help. He'd politely declined, knowing that now would be the worst time ever for a visit from his brother. Hayato seeing him like this wouldn't help either of them.

Today would have been another day when he lay there, only moving to grab the phone from the floor if his parents unnecessarily called or else going to the bathroom when nature unavoidably called. But then he heard the incessant yapping from his neighbour's dog, which could only signify the arrival of the post. He waited, counting in his head the amount of time that he knew it took to get from next door to here. Then, just as he was about to relax, the sound of letters being jammed through the letterbox jolted him back from drifting off once more.

For a few minutes longer he stayed there, knowing that there'd be nothing in the pile that he'd immediately want to deal with. He wasn't sure what eventually compelled him to get up off the sofa, but he did find himself standing staring down at the letters, with dull indifference.

It was the usual assortment of bills and junk mail. No one who Kisumi talked to had kept up with letters since he was a kid, so he never expected much. Even Rin and Sousuke had switched to video calls these days, which Kisumi often made a point of sitting in on when his mood was better than it was right now. Though even then, Kisumi reminded himself that Rin was back in the country after what had happened, so he doubted there'd be any more of those for a while.

He scooped up the junk, mentally sorting them into piles of what could be instantly thrown away and what was probably best kept for later inspection. And it was while he was doing this that the one letter that was neither bill nor junk stood out to him.

The stray letter was in a pale green envelope with a handwritten address, which was enough to make Kisumi stop and look at it as he flicked through the pile. A bad feeling spread across him and, sure enough, when he checked the return address he saw that the letter had come from the last place that he wanted it to.

The rest of the letters were dumped on a sideboard, because nothing about any of them mattered any more, and Kisumi made his way back to the sofa in a dream-like state. Only this time he sat down on it instead of collapsing in a heap.

He caught his hands shaking as he sat there holding the letter, trying to tell himself that there were a number of other things that it could be. Just because it came from Makoto's house didn't mean that...

...Well, there was no point in trying to figure out what it meant when he could just open the envelope and find out for definite.

It took Kisumi a moment to gain his composure, but then he steadied his hands and managed to open the envelope. He was gentle about it, because if this was what he thought it was then the last thing he wanted was to damage it, but the envelope was sealed tight, so he did rip it a little as he opened it. Though the tear only just cut into the corner of the letter though, which Kisumi was thankful for.

So he pulled out the paper that was the same colour as the envelope, swallowed hard, and started to read.

 

_'Dear Kisumi,_

_It's hard to know how to start this. You know why I'm writing and, if you've got this letter, then I assume that it's already happened. I'm not going to say sorry that it did, because it wasn't my fault. And I'm also not going to say sorry for writing my feelings to you instead of just telling you. I wanted to give you something you could keep, that you would always have to have unless you threw it away. Is that cruel?'_

 

Kisumi heard himself snort as he read that. Makoto had always been much more cruel than most people realised.

 

_'You're actually the first person I'm writing to, which by no means is because I think you're the easiest. If anything you're probably one of the most difficult. I've... always struggled to know exactly how I feel about you and you always did that dance to make sure I kept on struggling._

_I guess maybe it would be best to start with wishing you well for the future. Because I do. Part of me knows that even if I tell you to take care of yourself and not get into too much trouble that you'd just roll your eyes and bury yourself in trouble anyway. But I mean it, Kisumi. If there is an afterlife and I end up meeting you down here before you're forty then I'm not going to be happy with you.'_

 

It was hard not to smile at Makoto's assurance that they were both going to Hell. Kisumi wasn't about to argue with him.

 

_'And if you don't look after yourself for me then do it for Hayato. Yeah, that's a low blow, I know, but he's still young and he does need you. Last I checked with Coach Sasabe his swimming is coming along well and he wants to join a swim club when he gets into middle school. I know that swimming was never your favourite, but I also know that you love your brother and would do anything for him. So keep doing that. Keep being there for him and supporting him. Even if you take nothing else away from this letter, at least do me that much._

_But I didn't just write to you to tell you how you should live your life. Heck, I know you already have enough trouble with your parents telling you how to do that without me starting. I also wanted to talk about us. And this is hard, because the last thing I wanted to do was to write you a letter where I'm apologetic, but I do feel regret about us. We both had our different lives, our paths crossed only sometimes, and I think that was part of what we liked about each other. We were a refreshing break away from whatever else each of us was caught up in._

_But at the same time, I wish we'd had more time together. Part of me feels that even if nothing bad had happened to me and we'd both lived until we were ninety that we would have carried on the same way though – always just brushing upon each other's lives sometimes, always wanting more, but never quite going there, because we know that if we did then we'd break the magic. So maybe things were best just the way they were. All the same, I guess I'm just in one of those moments where I think about you and want more than I got._

_So thank you for being that little bit of sparkle, a different sparkle to what I got from anyone else. You mean a lot to me._

_Which brings me to what I really wanted to say. Look, I know that I said before that I wasn't going to give you any more advice, but I lied a little. You don't have to take this part and I know that even if you do, you'll struggle, but I'm going to say it anyway:_

_You mean a lot to other people as well._

_Maybe you won't accept it, but you touched upon so many other lives, not just mine. Sousuke and Rin talk about you all the time, even Haru is very fond of you, though he might not admit it. Everyone who you've spent time with cares about you, Kisumi, just as much as I do._

_And because of that, I'm telling you not to cut yourself off from them. You're already doing that right now, aren't you? Telling yourself that it would be wrong to bother them at this time, that if they don't come to you then they don't need you. But you're wrong, they do need you. Even if it is annoying that they don't come to you first. Trust me, I know that._

_If you go on as you have been, avoiding them and then only casually brushing past them on your way by, giving a smile and whatever else for one day, before going about your way again, then you'll regret it later on. Just like you regret it with me right now. So just... don't do that. Pull yourself up, go find them and be there with them. Even if it isn't easy at first. Even if he-'_

 

(Kisumi noticed that 'he' had been scribbled out here and replaced by 'they'.)

 

_'-they push you away at first, keep trying. Because they do want you in their lives and you want them. I would like it if you did that for me, though of course I can't force you._

_Well, I guess this has gone on long enough now and you're already feeling miserable, so I'll wrap this up._

_Goodbye and good luck, Kisumi. Look after yourself, look after Hayato, don't be a stranger and try not to end up dead too soon. That's not asking too much, right? :)_

_I love you,_

_Makoto.'_

 

That smiley face was the most passive-aggressive three marks of a pen that Kisumi had ever seen. And he'd personally dubbed Makoto as the master of passive-aggression. It was the final blow in a letter that had been hitting him over and over again.

He sat there for a few minutes, reading the last few lines so many times that they might well have lost all meaning. Only they didn't, because Makoto knew how to get to him. The letter became slightly crumpled in his grip, but he was careful not to let the tears fall onto it.

In all honesty, he could have just done nothing. It wasn't as if Makoto would ever know if Kisumi took his advice or not. But deep down Kisumi knew that he was at least right about the fact that Kisumi couldn't just stay here like this forever. Life was already tugging on his ankles to get back to it.

Although he wasn't sure how long he sat there for, he did eventually reach the decision to call his parents. It was a brief call and just as annoyingly formal as everything involving his parents was, but he got through it and assured them that he was doing fine – he would visit Hayato in the next few days and get back to work soon after that, but for the moment there was something else that he needed to do. Thankfully they didn't ask any questions, because Kisumi wouldn't have been up to explaining himself if they had done.

With that out of the way he went to change his clothes (because there was no way he was leaving in something that he'd worn for the last five days...), checked that everything was where it should be in the house and then headed out, locking up behind him.

There was someone who he needed to go see.

 

 

 


	2. Letter to Ikuya & Asahi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Kisumi sets out from his house, another letter reaches its destination. This time a single letter, to be shared between Ikuya and Asahi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since as far as anime canon goes we only have the High Speed movie to go on for Ikuya, Asahi, Natsuya and Nao, I had to take some liberties for what they might be doing while Makoto was in university. I like to think that I stuck close enough to what we know about the four of them though, so hopefully this won't be too jarring.

“I think I saw Kisumi go past,” Asahi called, from where he was sat out on their apartment's balcony, “Looked like he was in a hurry.”

“If it was him then it's good to know he's up and about again. I haven't seen him at all since... well, since the funeral,” replied Ikuya, who was trying his hardest to read a textbook that he just wasn't focused on.

“Can you blame him?” said Asahi.

“No, of course not...”

With each other, Ikuya and Asahi had mostly avoided talking about the subject of Makoto's death. It wasn't that they didn't care, far from it, but neither of them knew how to handle it. They'd both been good friends with him in middle school and Ikuya had no doubts that the swim team there had shaped all of their lives in some way. But afterwards they'd all gone to their different high schools and then (in some cases) to universities, so eventually they'd ended up just losing contact. It wasn't out of any sort of malice, it was just life. They'd all taken for granted that they would be able to see each other again whenever they wanted to, so it wasn't a big deal.

Until the day came when they couldn't just see each other whenever they wanted. Both Ikuya and Asahi were left feeling lingering regret that they hadn't gone out of their ways to visit Makoto and Haru more.

Ikuya would never forget the day when he saw Makoto propped up against those pillows in that hospital bed, looking at them with gladness that they'd come to see him. His face was entirely without blame, but that only made it seem worse...

“Hey, you're closest to the door, so can you get that?”

Asahi's request jolted Ikuya out of his line of thought. He looked over at the door, where a small pile of letters had hit the floor. He hadn't even heard the letters come through, but all the same he nodded and went to fetch them. After picking them up he sifted through the pile, taking out any that were for him and leaving Asahi's to take over to him in a moment. But there was one letter that decidedly wouldn't be sorted into a pile for Ikuya or Asahi.

It was addressed to both of them.

He stared at it in confusion for a moment, then he dumped his own letters next to the chair he'd been sat in and went out to the balcony with both Asahi's letters and the strange one that was apparently for them both. Asahi must have noticed something was off, because he sat up straight and looked across at him.

“What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost,” he said.

“That might... be a tactless choice of words,” Ikuya mumbled, though he hoped his suspicions were way off.

Asahi took the letters that were held out to him, but abandoned them on the table quickly. It seemed that he was much more interested in whatever had caught Ikuya's attention and seeing that the letter was also addressed to him, he had every right to know. So Ikuya pulled his own chair around from the other side of the table, cheap plastic scraping across the concrete floor, and sat next to Asahi. They could both read it easier that way.

“Don't be so mysterious. What's going on?” Asahi huffed. In any other situation Ikuya would have found some amusement in his pout, but he was too distracted to notice right now.

“I think this is a letter from... yes, it's, um, from Makoto...” Ikuya told him, as he slide the letter out of its envelope and saw the signature at the bottom.

“No way! Why are we only getting this now?” gasped Asahi.

“I have no idea. But we should... we should read it, right? Together...?” Ikuya whispered.

“Of course we should read it together! Makoto sent it to both of us, so he must have wanted that,” Asahi claimed, confident as always.

“If you say so...” replied Ikuya, who desperately wanted some of that confidence right now.

He held up the letter so that they could both see it. Part of him wanted to read it out loud, like Natsuya would have done for him when he was a kid, but he knew there was no need. They were both adults now and, seeing that both he and Asahi were younger siblings, they were more used to being read to than doing the reading. It was best that they went through this at their own paces. And seeing as Asahi's eyes were already racing over the page, it was safe to say that he'd already started anyway. So Ikuya did the same.

  
_'Dear Ikuya & Asahi,_

_I thought about it for a while and eventually decided to write one letter to both of you instead of two different letters. Which isn't because I don't care as much about either of you as I do about my other friends, so please don't think that. I guess it's because when I think of you, I do think of both of you. I met you two around the same time, you both came to mean a lot to me around the same time, then when you two both went to Sano High School, you left at the same time. So when I think back to middle school, I think of you two together. And of Natsuya and Nao, of course. I've decided not to write letters to them though, even though I care a great deal about them as well. It's not been easy to do this, so I was hoping that you could pass my feelings onto them. This letter is as much theirs as it is yours._

_The first thing I want to say that I feel regret that we all lost contact as we got older. I've written a few letters to various friends now and what's becoming clear is that I didn't spend as much time with many of them as I would have liked. In the case of us three, it was because I'd always thought it was easy to put off until tomorrow. Once we'd all graduated we'd have more time to see each other. Did you both feel the same way?_

_Anyway, even if I didn't see you more, I heard about you both. And what I heard made me happy. I was glad when I learned that you ended up sharing an apartment together when you started university. Moving away from home is a big step, but it does feel better to do it with friends. When I went to Tokyo, I felt so lucky that Haru came with me. And with you two, I felt that this move would be good for you both. Especially for you, Ikuya. Don't get me wrong, the boy I knew in middle school worked hard and proved that he didn't belong in his brother's shadow, but at the same time I did worry that your devotion to him might stifle you. Maybe it's not my place to say that. But even so, getting away from someone you lean on can help show you exactly how big the world is. Trust me on that.'_

  
“He's not wrong about you,” Asahi commented, once Ikuya had gotten to that part, “You're a much stronger person since you moved out.”

Ikuya snorted, to hide how emotional he felt; “Are you saying I was weak before that? What about you – your sister did everything for you.”

“Don't bring that up!” Asahi grumbled, “Now get back to reading.”

It sounded as if Asahi might have already finished the letter and Ikuya didn't want to hold him back. So he returned his focus to the paper.

  
_'And I can think of no better person for you to do that with than Asahi. The two of you always challenged each other. I'll never forget about all the bickering you used to do. But at the same time, if anything ever happened to you, Asahi was the first one to your side. Did you notice that? I hope you did.'_

  
Although Ikuya didn't dare look at Asahi, he quietly said, “Of course I did... Or I do now, anyway.”

  
_'You're both such colourful people, so passionate and brilliant at what you do. When Rin makes it to the professional circuit I know he's going to see both of you there. And I hope that you all show each other the best that Iwatobi has to offer. I don't think either of you got to meet Rin in the end. Or some of the other friends that I'm lucky to have made along the way. It makes me sad to think that my funeral might be the first time some of you meet... But even so, I hope one day that all of my friends become friends with each other as well. Kisumi still talks about you both sometimes and I know that Rei would like to see you again one day, Asahi. So maybe when you're both not busy with studying and training you could come by Iwatobi more. Even if it's just to visit Haru, I'm sure you'll meet all the others in time._

_I suppose I should talk a little to Natsuya and Nao here, shouldn't I? Don't worry, I don't mind if you read this part as well, Ikuya and Asahi._

_There's not much more I can say to my mentors except – thank you. Both of you inspired me with swimming and even when I got older had more of an impact on me than I realised. I was actually training to become a coach, just like you two. And before I had to drop out of my course, there were many times that I wanted to ask you both for advice. Even if I didn't in the end, I still feel that you both inspired me and helped me in this path. I know I would have made a good coach, because if I didn't then it would have let you down and I couldn't have that._

_And Nao, I can never thank you enough for making me think about why I swim back then. I know now that I do it because I love swimming and I love Haru, but I don't just love swimming because I love Haru. I needed to remember that both of these things are separate and one is not more important than the other. Without you making me think about that it might have taken me a lot longer to realise it, if I did at all. So you probably saved me from getting badly hurt, like I would have done if I kept going as I was. I can never thank you enough for that._

_To Natsuya, while I've always admired you, I admit that when I was young I maybe felt a little intimidated by you. Because you were such a bold and confident person. But now that I'm older I don't feel that way at all. I'd wanted to meet you as an equal and talk to you as one. Even if this now won't happen, I want to say this to you as one big brother to another – you need to always remember when to stay close and when to step away. It's not an easy balance. Sometimes you want to be there all the time, but that makes your siblings become too dependant on you, but if you back off too much then they'll feel like you don't care. I know that you and Ikuya tread a fine line and from what I've heard you're doing a good job. So just keep at it! It might be a never-ending task, but it is a very rewarding one.'_

  
Ikuya felt like he shouldn't have read that part. But he kept himself quiet and carried on.

  
_'Now, to all four of you, I can only wish the best for the future. Keep going, keep striving, keep working hard. But don't do it for me, do it for yourselves. I know that you will succeed._

_I love you all,_

_-Makoto'_

  
A definite silence settled over both of them. It must have been obvious that Ikuya had finished reading now, as he tilted his head back and let go of a long breath he'd been holding in. At his side, he knew that Asahi was waiting expectantly for him to respond, but he just didn't know what to say.

To focus himself, he started counting down from ten...

Nine...

Eight...

Seven-

“What do you think?” Asahi demanded.

“I don't know,” Ikuya replied, as he pulled his head back up to look over at him, “I just feel awful about all of this. He was such a good and caring person, thinking so much of everyone. Why should he be the first to go? And so young as well...”

Asahi shrugged; “It could happen to anyone. I know it's cruel, but that's life.” He paused here, but when Ikuya didn't add anything else, he went on, “Maybe we should call Natsuya and Nao? They deserve to read this as well.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea,” Ikuya agreed, “We'll call them first. And then... we should go see the others as well. Maybe not today, because if they're all getting these letters around about now then they might not want to talk. But soon, we should see them. Because we don't want to miss out, like we did with Makoto...”

“You're right there. But can we... see Rei first?” Asahi asked, “I'm not sure if I'd be up for seeing Haru just yet. It feels like too much. We can work towards that.”

“Sure, I've wanted to meet Rei ever since you started talking about him,” Ikuya replied.

Then he got up from the chair, knowing that he needed to call his brother about the letter now. He gave only a nod to Asahi, but the meaning was clear, so Asahi let him go. They were messengers now and it'd be wrong to hold back the message longer than they needed to. Especially when they would have time to talk as just the two of them later. They always did. And Ikuya was glad that they did.

He wouldn't be foolish enough to take any bonds for granted from now on.


	3. Letter to Sousuke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last of the letters that Makoto sent to Sano has arrived at Sousuke's house. And even though he's distracted by how badly Rin's been affected by the situation, Sousuke manages to read it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that there's been such a long gap since this fic was updated! I've got three multi-chaptered stories on the go right now, but I'm going to try to balance updating them all better in 2017, so wish me luck with that.

Sousuke felt a wave of guilt when Gou answered the phone, because he knew that she had nothing new to say to him. Nothing had changed since the last time that he'd called and he was calling too frequently. But while Rin was... like this, he couldn't stop himself from worrying. He would keep calling until something changed and in the mean time, annoy poor Gou with his insistence.

“Hey Sousuke,” she said, before he even had a chance to speak.

“Hey... um, I'm sorry to call again,” Sousuke muttered, “Has there been... any changes?”

“Not since yesterday, no,” Gou replied, “He's still shut up in his room, refusing to talk to me... I almost didn't take his food up this morning, hoping that would get him to move, but that wouldn't have been fair. He'll... he'll have to recover in time, but... well, he's so torn up about this. I've never seen him this way about anything before.”

“He was close to Makoto,” agreed Sousuke. Of course Rin had always been an emotional person and held all of his friends in high regard, so Sousuke wasn't surprised that losing one of them had destroyed him like it had done. All the same, Sousuke would keep worrying until Rin showed signs of improvement. He knew he was keeping Gou though, so he went on, “...I'll let you go now. Hope you don't mind if I call back later.”

“I'd be surprised if you didn't. But seriously, if there are any changes then you'll be the first to know,” Gou promised, “Oh yeah, have you... gotten any strange letters lately?”

“Letters? No, nothing like that. I think my mother got the post in earlier though, so I'll have to go check,” said Sousuke.

“You should do that, yeah. A-and don't feel that you need to ring me back about it if you do... find anything. That's your business,” Gou cryptically said, “Anyway, I'll speak to you later, Sousuke.”

“Take care,” Sousuke concluded.

As they both hung up, Sousuke found himself dwelling on Gou's confusing words about strange letters. It was enough to bring him out of his room and downstairs, where he found his mother sat behind the counter on the shop front, reading through a newspaper with her usual frown. It was quiet at this time of day, so she didn't have to worry too much about keeping an eye on the shop and, should anything happen, the sole security camera would hopefully catch it anyway. He coughed to get her attention and she looked up at him from over the top of the newspaper.

“...Any letters for me?” he checked.

“Yes, there was one,” she answered, “I left it through on the side-table, since I wasn't sure if you wanted to be bothered.”

“Okay, thanks,” Sousuke replied.

With that, he let his mother get back to her newspaper and headed through to look for his letter. They'd always been like that as a family, Sousuke mused, all three of them. They gave each other space, knowing that if one of them needed something then they would come ask for it. Most people would say that Sousuke's family lacked the affection that others had, but Sousuke wouldn't have it any other way.

All the same, once the pale green envelope was in his hands, he wished that his mother had let him know about it soon. He turned it over, took in the name above the return address and then tore off the top of the envelope.

“For the love of...”

Sousuke knew that he couldn't read this out in the hallway. He headed back upstairs, trying to act as composed as he could, so he didn't draw the attention of his parents. Once he was in his room though, he shut the door and hurried across to sit on his bed. Then he pulled the letter all the way out of the envelope and started to read it.

  
_'Dear Sousuke,_

_I bet this letter takes you by surprise and that the surprise isn't a very pleasant one. Sorry about that. I mulled over about writing to you a lot of times, because I knew that I couldn't leave you out, I would never do that, but knowing what to say was hard. At the end of the day, we didn't know each other all that well. We were friends with a lot of the same people, but whenever we were all together we'd both mostly stick to the back of our groups. I regret that now. So far for most of these letters I've been saying that I regret not spending time with people over and over like some sort of broken record, but I think that I feel it the most strongly in your case._

_Though there's little point now in getting upset over what could have been. When you're in my position, sitting in a bed, knowing that there aren't many what-could-have-beens left to go by until they all become what wasn't, it turns off part of your brain. You have to stop thinking about it or else you'll be overcome by the grief._

_So what I've been thinking about instead is what my friends might do once I'm gone. Honestly, that's been just as grim, if I'm honest. I'm not going to pretend that they'll all be magically okay once I'm gone. It'll take time. But I want to believe that eventually they'll get through it. Even if it takes longer for some than it does for others. I'm sure that I don't need to say here that one of the people I'm talking about is Rin, because I bet you're already well aware of that. It was thinking about Rin that helped me to start writing your letter, because I know how close you are to him. Look, I don't know you well enough to act as if I know what's going on in your head, but I feel that, at least on some vague level, I can understand your situation. You devote yourself so much to Rin, I've heard how hard you pushed yourself, yet you probably feel that if you can be by his side when he needs you, then that'll be enough to make you happy. Trust me, I know that feeling._

_Well, guess what? I'm the ghost of mortality, here to tell you that it doesn't work that way. And don't you dare put this letter down until you're done reading it.'_

  
At this point, Sousuke tore his eyes away from the letter, as a sudden annoyance swept over him. It felt wrong that Makoto would preach to him about anything, but especially this. Even Makoto himself had admitted that he didn't know Sousuke very well.

Yet, as the moments went by, Sousuke found that his usual rationality washed over him. He hadn't even read what Makoto wanted to say yet, so he should at least do that before he decided if his words were worth listening to. There was no point in getting annoyed about something based on his presumptions instead of what was said. With that in mind, he looked back at the letter again.

  
_'Are you still with me? Okay then, let me carry on. I know that your intentions are good. In an ideal world, nothing would stop you going on as you are, but we don't live in that kind of world. No matter how much you do for Rin, one day, one of you won't be there any more. I'm less than living proof of that. Or I will be when you get this. You can devote your life to one person as much as you want, but one day maybe they'll not be there or you'll not be there or else something less dramatic might happen to pull yourselves away from each other. And then what? I've been asking myself that over and over in regards to my situation. Because as much as Haru is stubbornly independent, it's true that the two of us leaned on each other a lot. Have I now made things harder for him because I'd always talk on his behalf when he was struggling? Heck, I know he won't be able to afford the apartment in Tokyo without me._

_...But enough about that. I'm not writing this to talk about me and Haru. It's just a tangent that I can't help myself going off on, because it feels so similar to what your situation might be with Rin. Only if I know Rin, he's probably already talked to you about this, hasn't he? He wouldn't want you to wreck yourself over being there for him. And you shouldn't. But whether you listen to him or me is a different matter entirely._

_I'm not saying don't be there for Rin. Do be there for him. But also be there for yourself and everyone else you know. Your world is bigger than one person. Gou cares about you a lot and I'm sure you're friends with your teammates in Samezuka as well. During the festival that time, I could tell that you'd become good friends with us if given the chance, too. Yet it came at a time when we were all drawing close to going our different ways, so it was harder to follow up on that. I wish now that we had done, but in my case it's too late. However, it's not too late for everyone else. If you want to call up Nagisa to hang out at any time of day or night, I promise you that he'll be right there ready to do that. And while the others might take a bit more prodding, they'll be glad of getting to know you more as well. Kisumi tells me that you've got a great sense of humour once you're comfortable enough with someone to show it – I would have liked to have seen that._

_This all comes down to me preaching at you and you're free to ignore it if you want. I can't stop you. But I hope that you'll listen. Even if you don't do it right away. Trust me, if you expand your world then it'll make Rin happy as well. Wait no, that goes against what I was saying before... you should do this for yourself, not for me or for Rin. Just do it, okay? Don't... end up like me. Don't lie on your deathbed and realise that you should have lived your life for yourself when it's already too late._

_Well, I think that's about as much guilt-tripping as I can manage for one letter. Whether you follow my advice or not, I hope that you can live your life to the fullest and find the happiness that you want. Maybe you're already doing just that and this whole letter has been pointless. I actually hope that's the case._

_I'm sorry that these words probably aren't making you like me any more, but I'll go back to saying what I said at the start – I do wish that I could have gotten to know you better. I wish I could have seen the funny Sousuke, who's comfortable to be around people. It's too late now of course. But even so, next time you're out somewhere, buy yourself a drink from me and have a good time._

_I love you,_

_Makoto'_

  
It was a strange way to end a letter after spending most of it talking about how he barely knew Sousuke at all. How could you love someone you barely knew? Sousuke's head was already too overwhelmed by the rest of it to think about that right now.

He put the letter on the sideboard next to his bed and then stared out of the window. It was a big window and his bed was pressed up against it. When he'd been a child, he could just about curl up on the ledge and watch the world go by through it, but now he was much too tall for that. Even so, he wanted to stay there for a while longer.

As he sat there, people went past down below. They were all going about their daily businesses, thinking about the people they care for and, in most cases, probably not sparing a thought for what would happen when they or those people weren't there any more. At one point, Sousuke saw a flash of pink going past, headed towards the train station. It might have been Kisumi. If so, then he was probably one person who was thinking about what he'd lost just as much as Rin and the others were.

Saying not to live your life for someone else was such obnoxiously simple advice. It wasn't that Sousuke blamed Makoto for it or even disagreed with him. Honestly, it was quite telling that someone who didn't know him that well would jump right in to talking about how close he was to Rin. In the past, Sousuke had gone too far and he knew that better than anyone.

And yet... no one can live their life purely for themselves, he thought. Makoto probably hadn't meant to imply that, because he'd even said that Sousuke should open up to other people. And he should. It just... wasn't easy.

His mobile phone was still sat on the sideboard next to the letter, which was where he'd left it after calling Gou. He turned his head to look at it, almost wanting to call her again. Though if he did that, she'd just assume he was only calling to ask how Rin was...

So instead of calling, he sent her a text.

  
_'comin over to see u both... if rin doesnt wanna talk thats ok but i wud like to see u...'_

  
After sending it, Sousuke got up and headed downstairs before he could talk himself out of it. His mother raised and eyebrow at him when she saw how much of a hurry he seemed to be in.

“Going out to see Rin and Gou,” he said.

“All right. Just make sure you're back before 10. The trains don't run after that,” his mother replied. As if he needed to be told this after living in Sano his whole life and making countless trips to Iwatobi. Yet, he knew that she only said it because she cared.

“Thanks, I will,” Sousuke assured her.

“And take some of the sandwiches from the fridge for those Matsuoka kids. I'll write them off the stock count later, but those kids need good food more than we need sandwiches,” she went on.

Sousuke wasn't sure exactly how far store-bought sandwiches went in regards to being good food, but even so, he thanked his mother and picked out a couple that he knew Rin and Gou would like. Then he hurried out the door, wondering that, if it had been Kisumi he'd seen on his way to the train station, if he'd catch him. Sousuke certainly hoped that he would.


	4. Letter to Nagisa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After several failed attempts to pick his friends back up from how hard they've been taking Makoto's death, Nagisa is beginning to lose hope. He too just wants to curl up and cry about what happened, so if something doesn't come along to distract him soon then he'll end up lost to his own sadness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this chapter is the first time I've written anything from Nagisa's perspective and now I feel bad that it's ended up being something so sad. I'll have to write a cheerful Nagisa fic to make up for it sometime.

Being Nagisa was a joy at the best of times and exhausting at the worst of times. And right now was the absolute worst of times. At first he'd tried as hard as he could for everyone else's sake, because Nagisa just knew what was going to happen – they were all going to close themselves off and hurt even more about what happened. Which wasn't what Makoto would have wanted at all. So Nagisa had seen it as his duty to pick them all back up, even if he wasn't feeling up to it.

...And it turned out that no one else was feeling up to it either, just like he expected. Only this time he couldn't just laugh off the rejections and try again later. Each time he called someone to find that either they or a family member said they weren't up to hanging out, it just made him feel worse. It made him accept more and more that they'd all never be the same again.

By the time he got to Haru's number, Nagisa didn't even try calling. He probably wouldn't have gotten an answer anyway and it was the most unfair to push this on Haru out of all of them.

Giving up had left Nagisa feeling empty inside. He needed the company of others to distract himself from thinking about what had happened to Makoto, but he also couldn't force that onto them. And so without anyone, Nagisa could do nothing else besides lie in his room and think about Makoto.

Of course there was his family, but they'd never understood Nagisa in general anyway, least of all at a time like this. Indeed, Nagisa had heard his parents warn his sisters away from bothering him, because they thought that he'd want to be alone. When honestly, now of all times Nagisa wouldn't have minded being bothered by someone. Yet he couldn't bring himself to call out for them...

A distraction did finally come mid-morning, however. He once again heard his sisters whispering outside his bedroom door and at first he assumed they were bringing him breakfast, but the conversation went on too long for that to be the case.

“But Mama said not to bother him!”

“What if this is important?”

“It's probably just a bill or something like that.”

“Since when does Nagisa get bills? And also, what kind of bills are in green envelopes?”

Curiosity won out and Nagisa pulled himself off his bed, went over to the door and opened it, causing his sisters to jump with a start.

“I'll take it. Whatever it is,” he said, his voice croaking from not being used in so long. Which was probably a first for Nagisa.

His eldest sister thrust a green envelope towards him; “This came just now. We weren't sure if you'd want it or not, but it's for you.”

“Thanks...” Nagisa mumbled. He took the letter, but then noticed that his sisters were still looking at him expectantly, so he added, “I'll be down for breakfast later.”

“But we finished breakfast ages ag- ...Ow! Heeey!”

“You can come down whenever you like, Nagisa. We'll all be happy to see you.”

“Yeah... But you didn't hafta elbow me, sis...”

Nagisa smiled across at his bickering sisters. It was actually nice to see that, despite everything, they were still the same as they'd always been. It gave him hope that maybe... maybe there was a point of return from this.

“Well, I'll see you all later. Better go and find out what this is,” Nagisa said, holding up the letter.

He knew that his sisters were probably curious as well, but he felt like this was something that he needed to see for himself first. Nagisa didn't often get letters and especially not ones that looked as pretty as this one did, so it had to be something special. As he closed the door he tried to ignore the disappointed looks on their faces. But by the time he'd got to the bed he could hear them walking away, so they can't have been too upset by being left out of it.

After flopping onto the bed and rolling over, Nagisa held the letter up to take a good look at it. Though he didn't even have to see the return address to recognise the handwriting. It was... it was Makoto!

This was just what he needed! With the hope of receiving some kind of important message that might save them all from their Makotoless fate, Nagisa tore the top off the envelope (and okay, a bit down the side as well, because the letter was annoyingly hard to take out) and pulled out the letter, which was also written on green paper. How just like Makoto...

Usually reading wasn't Nagisa's first choice of hobby, it felt too much like studying, but this time he dived right into the letter.

  
_'Hey Nagisa,_

_It's kind of a relief to write to you, I've gotta say. So far I've written many of these letters, so many that my hand hurts, and it's been really hard. There are so many people who I feel a lot of regret about for many reasons. But with you, it's like writing to an old friend who understands me very well. Though that's what you are, isn't it? So it makes sense that I'd feel that way. But what I mean is that I don't feel regret when I think of you. We must have both done something right._

_That doesn't mean that I don't have a lot to say though or that I don't worry about you. Because I already know that you'll have the weight of a lot of people on your shoulders by the time you read this. You and me are very similar, even if you might think that sounds crazy. We're both people who'll do anything to help others and who want to make sure our friends are always all right. I bet right now you're trying to rally the others together to help them through their sadness. That sounds exactly like something you'd do._

_But I also bet that they're not up to it and no matter how many times you ask the answer isn't changing. That must hurt...'_

  
So Makoto did know exactly what he was going through right now! A wave of relief ran through Nagisa as he got to that part of the letter, as surely it'd mean that Makoto had some advice that could help him save everyone from their own misery. He quickly read on.

  
_'The thing is... as much as I don't want them to feel sad forever, no one can force them to get over their grief. It must happen at its own pace. And I know that's frustrating for you, because you feel that the longer they stay alone the worse it'll be. You might be right about that and I definitely understand you wanting to be with them all for that reason._

_Even so, I'm worried that the pain of constantly being told no will hurt you too much. The last thing that I want is for a rift to come between you and the others because you think they don't want to see you. Because that isn't true at all. Everyone loves Nagisa! It's just that everyone deals with grief differently... If you ask me, your way is the best though and if I was there (even if that'd mean you wouldn't be in this situation...) then I'd definitely want to hang out with you as soon as I could, so that we could help each other through this. But most people aren't like us._

_Anyway, here's my request to you, if you think that you can do it:_

_Let them come to you._

_I know that it'll be hard and if by the time you get this you've already called them many times, you'll be feeling like that'll never happen, but believe me, it will. They might take longer, but once they've gotten through it all they will want to see them. And that's when you'll be waiting there, with a warm Nagisa smile and a hug. You'll help them so much and it'll make it all feel so much better._

_Now that I'm writing this part, in a way there is one thing that I feel guilty about when it comes to you. Because with me gone, the role of comforting the others and looking after them will fall entirely onto you. And that's not fair on you, is it? Though I know that you'll do a great job! It's a stressful position to be in, but you're the best suited to it, Nagisa. Even if it can be hard to keep a smile on all the time..._

_You know, I hope that one day you meet someone who you don't have to smile around all the time. Someone who can let you rest from it all sometimes and understands how hard the act is to always keep up. Maybe I should have been that person... But don't worry, I know that there are other people like that out there. And I hope you find them. Because being the life of the party is so very Nagisa, but when it becomes an expectation it can be too much.'_

  
At that point, Nagisa had to take a break from reading the letter. Because as much as he knew Makoto's advice was right, it still hurt and he didn't want to admit it to himself. If he did give up on calling the others and then they never called him, then that would be the end and what could Nagisa do then...?

By the time he looked back down at the sheet of paper it was almost as if Makoto had read his mind though.

  
_'Sadly, there's very little I can do to help you from where I'll be by the time you're reading this. But I will try. I'm sending all of the others letters as well and through them I hope to give everyone the kick up the backside they need to get over it and start to move on. If by the time they've read their letters you get a call from at least one of them then I've done my job right. And if I've done my job fantastically maybe you'll even make some new friends through this. Just wait and see._

_Well, I know that you don't like long letters and I think that I've said the most important thing that I wanted to say now. Of course, because it's you, I could ramble on for hours. But it's just not the same doing it like this instead of face to face – it's more fun to talk to you than at you. So I'll wrap it up now, Nagi-chan. Huh... did anyone ever call you that? You always call everyone else -chan and I like it a lot, but did anyone ever think to call you that? I hope that someday they do. Maybe you should just tell them to, because some people will never get the point if you just leave it to them._

_Anyway, take care and don't push yourself too hard. You have a big role ahead of you, but you need to know that you can rely on other people as well._

_I love you,_

_Makoto'_

  
Upon reaching the end of the letter, Nagisa held it close to his chest and cried. Big, loud crying that he should have let himself do earlier. He hadn't cried like this since the funeral and only now was he seeing how much he needed to.

How could he go on like Makoto wanted him to? He didn't even think that he'd make it down to breakfast now.

...And yet, he had to. Because his family had been worried about him all this time and it was his role to see to it that no one had to feel sad because of him. No, it wasn't easy, just like Makoto had said, but if he couldn't help his friends right now then he could at least start with his family.

So he got up and got dressed for the first time in days, specifically pulling out one of his cutest outfits and putting the most effort into his appearance, because it felt as if that was the right thing to do. Once he was ready, he headed down for breakfast.

His family were of course glad to see him, sitting around the table even though they'd long since finished their own breakfasts. Thankfully they didn't ask too many questions and let him talk at his own pace, which was what he needed right now. And soon enough he was chatting to them almost like normal, maybe even better than he had done for a long time. He even told them about Makoto's letter, because he didn't feel like it was something that needed to be kept a secret.

He was on his third round of pancakes by the time the phone rang, but in their house the phone was always ringing a lot, so he didn't pay it much mind, assuming it'd be one of his sisters' friends. It surprised him when she came back through to the kitchen, saying it was “that loud guy” calling for him.

Nagisa took the phone, pushing his chair a little back from the table.

“Hello?”

“Nagisa, I finally got through to you. You've been ignoring my texts,” said the slightly panicked voice of Rei.

“Oh, Rei-chan! I left my phone upstairs when I came down for breakfast. Sorry about that,” Nagisa replied, “I'm glad to hear from you. I've been super worried...”

“Y-yes... I'm sorry that I gave you cause for concern. And that I've been... less than receptive to your invitations,” Rei said, “But I had to tell you... well, this morning I got a letter from Makoto-”

“-I got one of those, too!” Nagisa cut in.

“Ah, I thought you might have done,” said Rei, “Well, it turns out we weren't the only ones. A short while after receiving the letter, I also received a call from a friend I hadn't heard from in a long time. Though actually that's not strictly true – he was at the funeral, but we weren't able to talk much then. So it turns out that my friend, Asahi, also got one of these letters from Makoto. We talked for a while about how it felt wrong to put off until tomorrow what you can do today, so we've arranged to meet up, along with one of his other friends. Though, ah, we did have to do it tomorrow, because they were both busy today.”

“Oh, I see...” Nagisa trailed off. He didn't mean to, but for some reason it hurt him to think that after Rei had turned down so many invitations from him that he'd accept one from this other person.

“No, what I mean is that I wanted... I wanted you to come as well,” Rei corrected, “That's why I'm calling. I thought it'd be nice for us all to spend time together, since it turns out that we were all friends with Makoto. I feel like that's what he'd want.”

So Nagisa had waited and it wasn't long until they came back to him, just like Makoto said...

“I'd love to,” Nagisa replied, with a warm smile that Rei couldn't see.

“Great! Should I call Haru as well?” asked Rei.

“...Actually, maybe not this time. I think we should wait until Haru-chan's ready to come back to us. Don't wanna smother him, y'know? He might be taking this the hardest,” Nagisa said.

There was a pause on the other end. It seemed as if Rei hadn't expected such a reply from Nagisa and Nagisa couldn't blame him for that. After all, it wasn't the usual sort of thing for him to say. But after that pause it seemed as if Rei agreed with him.

“You're probably right, yes. I'm sure there'll be other times when he can come with us to see Asahi and his friend,” Rei agreed, “Anyway, I'll let you get going for now. I'll text you with more information about tomorrow when they get back to me about it. And I'm... looking forward to seeing you.”

“Looking forward to seeing you too, Rei-chan,” Nagisa concluded.

He felt better after that. Although he knew that this wasn't the end, that he'd have to step up to smile for everyone now that Makoto was gone, he also knew that he could do it. And who knows, maybe one day he'd find that person who he didn't have to smile around all the time.

Tomorrow was full of promise.


	5. Letter to Momo & Nitori

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Nitori gets an out of the blue invitation to visit the Mikoshiba brothers, it turns out to be because they have a letter that's partly for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so how about those three new Free! movies announcement, huh? I'm as excited as many to see the series carried on. Though it made me think that I want to try and wrap up this particular fanfic before they come out or at the very latest, before the third one comes out, since that deals more with what comes next from the looks of it. The reason being that this fic is near future post-canon and I'm sure that whatever happens in the movies will be vastly different from what happens in this fic. At least, I hope Makoto doesn't actually die in the series itself, because that'd make me angry. Anyway, I know it's not a big deal really and fanfiction can be whatever you want, but I'd still rather finish this fanfic before we know the full details of what comes next in the movies, so I have an excuse for the differences here. What that means for you guys is that you'll be hopefully be getting more frequent updates, so yay!

The way to Seijuro's apartment – sorry, the Mikoshiba apartment – was a familiar one to Nitori by now. He didn't know the full details of the situation, because trying to get Momo to talk about anything serious when he didn't want to was impossible and Nitori didn't feel right asking Seijuro questions, but he knew that there had been some upset at home that caused Momo to leave in the year after his graduation from Samezuka. Fortunately Seijuro was already living in his own place by then, so Momo just moved in with him. He'd told Nitori that it wasn't so bad, because he still got to see his mother and his sister a lot, which seemed to be what mattered to him most.

But because Nitori and Momo were... pretty much best friends by this point, if Nitori could be bold enough to think as such, he ended up visiting the apartment a lot. Heck, he could probably walk the route there blindfolded.

And one thing that wasn't unusual for Nitori was getting messages from Momo asking him to come over out of the blue. Momo was definitely a spur of the moment type of person. Even so, there had been something different about the call he'd made this morning. Not even Momo's best efforts to mask that could deter Nitori from picking up on it. Whatever Momo wanted to talk to him about, it was serious.

Which was why Nitori hesitated a bit longer than usual when he reached the door. There was no going back though, so he rang the bell and within seconds Momo had pulled it open, his usual smile etched across his face.

“Ai! Glad you could make it! Come in,” he greeted, all but pulling Nitori through the door, “Man, how many times do I have to tell you that you can just walk right in? It's not as if I didn't know you were coming.”

“Maybe next time I will,” said Nitori. Though he knew fine well that no matter how many times Momo told him it was okay that he'd never just invite himself into someone's home – that felt rude; “...So where's Seijuro? Is he in?”

“Nah, not right now,” Momo replied, shutting the door behind them, “After he read the letter he... wanted to go for a walk. My brother deals with stuff weird. But he said that I should call you, since it's for you as well.”

“A letter for me?” checked Nitori. That didn't make much sense. If there was a letter for him then wouldn't it just be sent to him? Though it sounded as if the letter wasn't only for him. In which case, who would want to write to him and the Mikoshiba brothers?

“Yeah, it came this morning,” said Momo, as he thrust the letter into Nitori's chest, “We read it as soon as we got it and... well... I should just let you read it for yourself. No point in me explaining it. You might want to sit down though. Do you want a drink? I'll get you a drink.”

Nitori raised an eyebrow at him. He was being strange even for Momo. And that was saying something.

“I'm fine, I got something to drink before I came out,” Nitori dismissed.

“I'll get you a soda,” stated Momo, talking louder than Nitori, “But they're... eh, right in the back of the cupboard... Yeah! So this might take a while. Don't wait for me!”

And with that, Momo was gone. Whatever he was saying about the cupboards had to be a lie, because Nitori knew that everything in this apartment was tiny, too tiny for these big, loud brothers to be living in really. The cupboards were all tiny as well. Also, Nitori strongly suspected that Seijuro was practically living on protein shakes now, so if Momo did find any soda in the kitchen it'd be a miracle. Though that probably just gave him an excuse to pretend to be looking for it for so long...

What was in this letter that Momo so badly didn't want to be around while he was reading it?

It was on pale green paper, which was unusual enough. It looked like the sort of paper you'd get in a children's writing set, Nitori decided. And the handwriting didn't seem that familiar, but then he glanced down at the bottom of the page and... oh no... that name was familiar... Suddenly he understood why Momo hadn't wanted to be around. And he'd been right about it probably being best to sit down, too. Nitori lowered himself into the chair before he even started to read it.

Deep breaths, he told himself, almost as if he was preparing to give a speech. Once he'd decided that he was ready he started to read.

  
_'Dear Momo & Nitori,_

_I hope that you don't mind that I've written to both of you together. It was harder for me to know what to say, as horrible as that is to admit, because I don't know the two of you as well as I'd like. But I know that you're good friends with each other, so this seemed appropriate. I hope that you can forgive me. I'm going to send this letter to Momo, because I could remember the address of that apartment first, but please also show it to Nitori when you're done reading it, Momo._

_So I guess I should talk to Momo first, since you're the one who'll probably read the letter first.'_

  
Nitori paused there. It didn't feel right to read something that was written just for Momo. So he called into the kitchen.

“Hey... um, should I skip the first part? The part for you?” he asked.

“Nah, it's fine!” Momo yelled back through, his voice muffled enough to make it seem like he genuinely was pulling the cupboard apart, “I read your part, so you can read mine.”

Honestly, Nitori would have liked for Momo to ask him before he read his part, but then that's just what Momo was like. Hopefully there wasn't anything too private in there...

But since Momo said it was okay for Nitori to read his part of the letter, he carried on.

  
_'I hope that you're doing well. Maybe that's the simplest thing to say, but it's true. Rin talked to me at least a little about your home life and I'll admit that I never would have guessed that about someone as cheerful and upbeat as you. I was glad to hear when you moved out of your dad's house and in with your brother. Just try not to have too many wild parties, okay? I think that poor Nitori might kill himself with stress worrying about you if you do.'_

  
Nitori shook his head. That wasn't far from the truth.

  
_'But even if you can be very excitable, I know that you have good friends looking after you, so it should be fine. Actually, I was glad to see that Rin had found close friends in you all. Before that I had been kind of worried about Rin. More than kind of, if I'm honest. But then when I saw him with you three, having made his own team, I knew that I didn't have to worry so much. You all seem like a good balance for each other and I'm glad that Rin found you all. He'll probably be taking my passing very hard, if I know him well, so maybe right now he'll have pushed you all away... But I hope that you can go back to him. Even if he says some wrong things while he's hurting, I can tell that he cares about you a lot, so go easy on him._

_I guess my advice for you would be... steady as you go. Slow down a little. Stop to smell the flowers. But also don't go too slow or let those around you stop, especially Nitori, Rin and Sousuke. You need to be their energy and from seeing your backstroke I know you have plenty of that to share around with everyone._

_Also... I know you won't want to hear this, but I don't think Gou's interested in you. I'm sorry. But if you keep pestering her telling her about yourself then I don't think that's going to change. Maybe it would be better if you took the time to get to know her as a friend, she'd appreciate that. Instead of talking about yourself so much, try asking about her and listening. That would be best. And I'm not trying to tell you this as romance advice. Wow, that would be awful of me... I suppose it's better to say that this is friend advice. Gou is a great friend and I know for a fact that when you have her as a friend yourself that you'll understand that, too._

_Right, I think that was everything I wanted to say to you. Though before I move onto Nitori, I also want to talk to Seijuro for a moment. So could you give this letter to him?'_

  
“Should I skip past Seijuro's part?” Nitori asked.

“You can read it if you want. We both read your part, so I don't think he'd mind,” answered Momo.

“Geez! Thanks for asking first...” Nitori muttered.

  
_'Seijuro, hey! Part of me wants to say something cool like “from one captain to another”, but that doesn't feel right. I'm afraid I'm not very cool. But anyway, I didn't want to leave you out when I was writing to everyone. This time I don't have much advice to give though, because from what I hear about you, it seems that you have your life very together. You have your own place, you're looking after your brother well and Rin told me that you're studying in a police academy now? That's pretty impressive! I could see you as a police officer, honestly. And I wish I could have had my life as together as you do, even before all this came about._

_It probably can't have been easy for you, based on what Rin also told me about your family situation... But you're a good person to take your brother in like that. Being a caring big brother is important. I hope you don't take too much on your shoulders, but also I feel that you're strong enough to be fine no matter what you do._

_I could maybe say the same stuff about Gou to you, but I feel that you've already come to realise it yourself and it wouldn't be right for me to tell you what to do when you're older than me. But anyway, I do hope that you and Momo can both become good friends with Gou someday, because she deserves all the friends in the world._

_Okay, now I really am going to move onto Nitori's part.'_

  
Reading that made Nitori grip the letter tightly. This was for him...

  
_'What I want to say to you stems from something more recent. We don't know each other that well, but you still came to visit me in the hospital. On your own even. I appreciated that. And I appreciated that even though you were polite and shy about it, you still asked questions and listened to my answers. Most people assumed that I didn't want to talk about my treatment and... on a lot of days I didn't, but there were also times when I did. You came to me at a time when I knew that the treatment had failed, where the cancer was too far along and they'd given me an estimation of how long I had left, because there was nothing else they could do, and you asked me about it. It wasn't until you did that I realised that I wanted to talk about it... So I'm sorry that I might have overloaded you with information, but I'm glad that you listened and I'm glad that you were sympathetic._

_You're a person who doubts yourself a lot and that's a shame, because you're already doing all the right things. You care about people. You ask them questions. You listen to them. You sympathise with them. These are all the right ways to go about it. Now if you only had confidence in yourself then you'd be at the top of your game. Though... it's not as easy as to just ask someone to have confidence. I know that. If it makes you feel better though, you do seem to have improved a lot since back when you were in your first year. Rin made a good choice to put you as the captain when he graduated and I think being in that role helped you a lot, too._

_Speaking of Rin, I hope that you're not hurting too much worrying about him right now... It's always been obvious how much he means to you. I can only say the same as what I said to Momo – Rin will be going through so much at the moment, but it's good that he has caring friends like you guys. I know that when he's ready to pick himself back up that you'll all be waiting for him. And that makes me feel better about leaving him behind._

_Thanks to all three of you for listening to my advice. I hope that this was useful to you and that it didn't come across as being just the ramblings of a stranger. Know that you were all in my thoughts and if I could do it again then I would have taken the time to get to know you all a lot better._

_I love you all,_

_Makoto'_

  
...Nitori put the letter down on the arm of the chair, curled his legs up into his chest and started crying. That was when Momo came back through from the kitchen, without soda, went over to him and hugged him tightly. It was a gesture that Nitori was thankful for, even if he couldn't bring himself to talk for a good few minutes after that. He kept on crying and, for once, Momo stayed quiet, just gently rocking him as he held him. The motion was soothing and it did a great deal in helping calm Nitori's nerves.

Eventually, he was ready to talk again.

“That was... that wasn't easy to read...” he whispered, “Thanks for being there, Momo...”

“No problem. I'm just sorry I couldn't stay in the room while you were reading it,” Momo replied.

“It's fine, I think I felt better for being on my own,” Nitori admitted. Then he took a deep breath, “It was awful seeing him in the hospital, you know? He was so frail and weak at that point... nothing at all like that strong guy we used to see at the relays... And yet he was still smiling... I'm g-glad that I went to see him, even if it was hard...”

“Sounds like he was glad you went too, looking at what he wrote,” agreed Momo.

“Yeah... well, what comes next?” Nitori asked, “I'm honestly not sure after that...”

“Oh, that's easy,” said Momo, with such strong assurance that it surprised Nitori, “The last thing that guy wanted was for us to be moping around after him. So we should do what he wanted and live our lives to the best. That's what I'm going to do! ...Also, it turns out we don't have any soda, so we should go out to that juice place while the weather's still nice. How about it?”

It wasn't as if Nitori had even wanted soda in the first place, but that wasn't the point. Hanging out with Momo, appreciating the friend he had while they were both here to do so, that sounded like a good idea right now.

“Sure,” Nitori answered, uncurling himself from the ball he'd wound into and getting up off the chair, “Let's go do that.”


	6. Letter to Rin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone knows how hard the loss of Makoto has hit Rin. He's been shut up away from the world, unable to deal with it, ever since. Only it turns out that Makoto has a few things he wants to say to Rin about that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got to confess, this is the chapter I was the most nervous about doing. The Rin & Makoto dynamic is such a popular one in the fandom and for good reason, so I was worried about messing it up. All I can say is that I tried my best for this first time writing it, so please go easy on me.

It was all too much right now. The noise from the washing machine downstairs, the cars outside, the occasional beep from his phone as it received a message from yet another person who couldn't take a hint. All those sounds were unbearable. Maybe they could have acted as a distraction, to stop him thinking about Makoto, but all they actually did was whir around in Rin's head, as if they were mocking him for even trying to focus on something that wasn't them.

Not for the first time, Rin put his head until the pillow and held it tightly, willing for the whole world to shut up.

Also not for the first time, he heard footsteps as Gou came to the door. He felt terrible for ignoring her, but he just couldn't handle anything right now. Yet she was just as stubborn as he was, so she talked to him despite not expecting to get a reply.

“That was Sousuke on the phone before. You know he's going to keep calling until you talk to him,” she said.

Of course Rin knew that. An equal part of him felt terrible for ignoring Sousuke as well, but he just... just couldn't face up to any of them. Surely Sousuke of all people should have understood that best. And yet he kept on calling...

Rin didn't reply and Gou left him alone. But it wasn't long before she came back again. It seemed as if she had more news, even though Rin hadn't heard the phone ringing, unless the pillow had muffled it out entirely. But everything was so noisy right now that he doubted that was possible.

“Hey, so Sousuke text me this time. He says he's coming over,” Gou told him, “But it's... no pressure on you. I want to talk to him as well, so if you don't feel up to it then don't worry about coming down. Although... I think you should read this. It's probably time...”

He didn't know what she meant by “read this”, but as he took the pillow off his head and looked towards the door, a letter was slid underneath it. The room was dark, he'd had the curtains drawn since the funeral, so he couldn't make it out very well. Curiosity got the better of him though, so he pulled himself up off the bed, legs shakier than he remembered from all the days of not eating properly, and made his way over to the letter. Gou was waiting on the other side still and Rin knew that she could hear his footsteps across the floorboards.

“Thanks...” he said. His voice was hoarse.

“Take your time with it,” Gou replied.

With that he heard her walk away. Perhaps it was harsh, but he was a little glad that she hadn't stuck around and wanted him to open the door to talk at the moment. He owed her a talk, many of them in fact, but he just couldn't do it right now. He was barely even sure that he was up to whatever this letter was, but he'd committed now and he wasn't going back.

It was too dark to read, so as he went back over to his bed he pulled the curtains open, squinting for a moment as his eyes struggled to adjust to the light. But when they had, he was able to look down at the envelope... the decidedly green envelope...

“Fuck...”

How dare Makoto think he was ready for this.

Rin sat on the bed, feeling his heart beating ten to the dozen. Suddenly all the everyday noises, as loud as they were, might as well have been nothing. Not compared to this. The person he'd spent almost every moment thinking about since he'd first gotten the news had written to him, written to Rin. And that was important.

He opened the envelope with the utmost care, though his hands were so shaky that he didn't know how he managed to do it without tearing anything. He did it though, the envelope didn't get damaged even slightly and the letter remained pristine as he pulled it out. That was without a doubt Makoto's handwriting. This was it. Rin took a deep breath and started to read.

  
_'Dear Rin,_

_Oh god, this whole thing is a mess. I've been writing so many letters, trying to act as if everything's fine and give people advice that might help them, because that's the right thing to do, but really I'm breaking down inside. And outside. I'm dying, Rin, actually dying. How can anyone be okay when they wake up in the morning counting down the days until it might be over? And yeah, I know all that wisdom about how we're all doing that anyway, but not many people know their exact expiry date. I do. And it's soon. And then I'll be gone...'_

  
The writing grew unusually large and unsteady here. Rin assumed that Makoto must have taken a break to compose himself before he carried on, because in the next paragraph his handwriting had returned to looking more like what Rin was used to seeing of it.

  
_'I'm actually scared of becoming nothing, you know? I'm scared that one day I'll just stop and I won't even be able to think “huh, this is so weird” because there'll be nothing there for me to think with. I'll be gone. And you'll all still be there... I'm in equal parts jealous of you all and scared for you all, because I know that some of you are going to struggle without me..._

_Speaking of that – how dare you?_

_I know what you're doing, Rin. I know that you've been lying in your bed every day since I died, hating the world and everything in it, crying over the loss of me. That's why I told Gou to wait before she gave you your letter, because I didn't want this to be swallowed up in your fit of sadness. I wanted you to have taken a good, long time to thin your feelings out, exhaust yourself, so that when you finally do get to read this, you might take it in properly.'_

  
With that, Rin tore his eyes away from the letter. His hands were still shaking, but this time it was with hot anger. All this time Makoto knew that he was going to send Rin his final message and yet he purposely withheld it? And Gou helped? That was not okay, not at all.

Well he wasn't going to give Makoto the satisfaction!

He threw the letter down onto the floor, rolled over in his bed and ignored it. If Makoto wanted him to take more time to calm down before reading his precious words then Rin would damn well give him all the time in the world!

...Except that... Makoto no longer wanted anything. Because there was no Makoto to want. Rin bit his lip and allowed the noise to wash over him once more...

In time the washing machine stopped, even if the cars going past outside were still as noisy as ever. And Rin heard the doorbell go, followed by muffled voices that could only belong to Gou and Sousuke. He was here.

Rin had to do this.

He reached down to pick up the letter, smoothing out where it had gotten crumpled with a sudden pang of guilt. Then he carried on...

  
_'Are you done yet? Ready to keep going?'_

  
Makoto knew him far too well. Those two questions were there on their own, as if Makoto was sure that Rin would have gotten too angry to carry on for a while. But he also knew that Rin would come back to it, because Makoto knew Rin... And Rin wasn't going to let him down in this.

  
_'Look Rin, I'm not going to sugar coat this, because even if you get mad, what does that affect me where I'm going? No, the people you're affecting is everyone else and you need to stop to take this in. Because I know that you know this already, I know that you're feeling guilty for what you're doing, but that only causes you to spiral further into how much you hate yourself and the world. So let's just get to the point:_

_You need to stop this right now._

_Don't spend another day reflecting upon how you feel about this letter. Because if you spend another day, then it'll turn into a week and then before you know it you've pushed everyone away again and you'll feel too bad to accept their help after so long. Take their help now. Go downstairs and talk to Gou when you're done. She's done so much for you... for all of us. When I knew I wanted to post these letters out, it was her that I turned to and asked to do it for me, because she's so reliable. But she's not bulletproof, Rin. There's only so much she can or should have to deal with. You have to share the burden with her. I'm not asking you, I'm telling you._

_And you know that it's not only Gou affected by you – Sousuke, Nitori, Haru, even Momo and Nagisa. They're all going to be hit hard by your actions. And some of them are already mourning over the loss of me, so they don't need to be mourning over you as well. Especially when you're not the one who's dead._

_I know the world sucks and right now I'm in a better position than you are to say that it does. But no matter how much it sucks, your actions can make a difference. People are drawn to you, Rin. Use that to help them, like I know you can. You more than anyone can push yourself so hard, do so much, become the top of your game and make everyone so proud of you. I couldn't do what you can do. And that's why you need to do it. You need not to stop moving for so long that you break, because the world still needs Rin. Don't take yourself away from them when they need you._

_...I'm crying again. I feel so horrible saying all this to you, but it needs to be said and this is my last chance to do so. This is the last thing that I can do to make a difference to everyone's lives, so I'm going to do it. Then you have to keep on making a difference once I'm gone... promise me that you will._

_Go talk to Gou, go talk to Sousuke, go talk to Nitori and whoever else you need to. Get it all out. All the sadness and the anger. Get it into the open. Tell them what an awful jerk I've been to you in this letter. Laugh about it with them. And then... start to recover. Let other people recover too and then they can help you do the same._

_And speaking of other people recovering, I feel awkward for saying this and I know that you don't actually owe me anything, but I'd be thankful if you could leave Haru for just a little bit longer, until he comes to you. I know how much you and Haru mean to each other, but in this you'll just have to trust me when I say that I've already got Haru covered. He will come to you when he's ready and after that you can be there for him as much as you are for everyone else. Trust him and trust me._

_I should... wrap this up now. It feels wrong though. It feels like I could write you hundreds of pages and still not be done talking to you. But if I do that then it might dilute my message and I want you to take away all of my demands and hold them close to your heart. Am I too cruel?_

_No, this is it. I mean, I'll see you in person one more time before I pass, since Gou's told me you're heading back over from Australia. So yes, when we talked that day I had already written this letter. I'm that much of a jerk. But sometimes you deserve it._

_Just... take care of yourself. The noise outside your window isn't that bad._

_I love you,_

_Makoto'_

  
...The morning traffic rush was over now. Only the odd car was passing by. The washing machine had stopped. The world was now entirely absent of noise...

Except that it wasn't. Because downstairs were the soft sounds of conversation between two people who care about Rin so much. Gou, who's been looking after him even when he wanted the world to stop, and Sousuke, who never stopped checking up on him even when Rin felt like he never wanted to talk to anyone again.

Makoto was right. They deserved better than he was giving them right now. And he deserved to have the people around him to open up to. He wasn't going to push them away. Not this time.

So Rin placed the letter on his pillow, got up off the bed, and went downstairs to see them.


	7. Letter to Gou

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long journey for Gou, but now that they're all starting to heal she can take a step back to breathe and reflect on everything that she's done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of this chapter directly follow on from the previous one. Don't worry, I wasn't going to be cruel enough to leave you hanging on all that.

Nothing had felt good for a long while, but right now talking with Sousuke felt good. He didn't know that Gou had posted the letters, Gou reckoned, not from the way he was talking. She wasn't sure if Makoto would tell any of them that she had done, though she supposed that she'd find out in time.

Because whatever Makoto was doing, it seemed to have worked. Or be starting to work, rather. Not only was Sousuke here talking to her, but he'd said that he'd shared a train with Kisumi on the way over, who was also on his way to see someone himself, and that on the walk from the station to their house, Sousuke had seen Nagisa, who made him promise to hang out with him soon and said that Gou should come too. Everyone was starting to improve.

“It was kind of strange,” Sousuke said, “I mean, I agreed to hang out with him, but you know that I can seem off to people sometime. But before he left he said that he was glad that I wanted to and that I wasn't smiling. No one's ever said that before.”

“Nagisa's kind of an enigma,” admitted Gou, “But I'm glad that you agreed with him, since he needs company. The two of you will get on like a house on fire, I bet.”

Sousuke looked at her with a face of utter confusion. And then he looked over her shoulder and out into the corridor, his eyes going wide with surprise. She hardly dared to believe what it was, but as she turned to look herself, she found that everything she'd hoped for since the funeral had come to pass...

Rin was standing right there.

“...Hey. I'm sorry that I made you guys wait, but I... well, thanks,” he mumbled, rubbing the back of his hair and looking down at the floor, “...I'm here now.”

“You look awful,” Sousuke said. It was true.

Then both of them went over to Rin and hugged him. Rin hesitated for a moment, but then the hug was returned and they squeezed one another tightly. They were finally all together again, supporting each other like they always should be. Makoto's letter must have worked its magic once more.

None of them wanted the moment to end, but eventually it had to. Gou pulled away first, patting Sousuke on the arm to prompt him to do the same. He did and Rin stepped back, smiling now as he looked across at them.

“I'm so lucky to have you guys... So, so lucky...” he said.

“Yeah, you are,” agreed Gou.

“I'll go put on some coffee. Never a bad time for that,” offered Sousuke. Both because he knew his way around their kitchen almost better than they did and because he knew how they both liked their coffee anyway.

He ambled past the two of them and Gou watched Rin watching him go. It was good that Rin had Sousuke. Actually, it was good that they both did.

“You should go with him,” Gou said.

“Don't you want to talk to me first?” Rin asked. He looked genuinely surprised.

“I do, but... I haven't read my own letter from Makoto yet. I barely dared to before you got yours, only now... everyone seems to be getting better,” she explained.

“Yeah, Makoto does have a way with words,” Rin laughed, though it had a slightly awkward edge to it, “You should definitely go read yours now. I'll keep Sousuke distracted for you.”

Gou blew a raspberry at him; “Sure, because Sousuke's the one that's always such a hassle.”

“I'm hurt,” Sousuke called from in the kitchen.

“You keep out of this,” shot Gou.

They were all laughing now, all so cheerful, despite everything. For the first time in a while, Gou truly felt that she could walk away from the others without coming back to find them all ruined. So that was exactly what she did. With a nod to Rin, she turned and headed up to her room, where her own letter was waiting for her. The envelope was already opened, but she'd not been able to bring herself to read what was inside it before now. Well, now was the time. She sat at her desk and opened it out.

  
_'Dear Gou,_

_First of all, thank you so much for sending out these letters. It was a big burden to put on you, but I knew that you were the one person who I could trust to do it. You keep a level head above all and even if everyone else was consumed by what's happened, I knew that I could count on you to get the job done. Thank you for always being so dependable. People don't tell you enough that without you we'd probably be no where, not in the swim club and probably not even all back to being friends with Rin after so long. You're the unsung hero of everything._

_And I guess because of all that, I worry about you so much as well. You carry the weight of the others' burdens, but who's there to do the same for Gou? That's why I tried to give some of them a shove in the right direction when I wrote to them, to take some of the load off you. Because you'll never stop what you do, even if I tell you to put yourself first, but that doesn't mean that everyone else should just let you do it all. If they don't start giving you respect after this then tell them all that the ghost of Makoto will come back to smite them._

_...Only don't tell Nagisa that, because he'll probably do it on purpose just to see if my ghost actually does turn up. Man, this lot can be such a handful. How do you put up with us?'_

  
Gou heard herself giggle as she read that part. Of course she wouldn't change her boys for the world. Even if Rin could be difficult, Sousuke could be grumpy, Haru could be a liability, Rei could be eccentric, Nagisa could be downright wild and Makoto could be-

...Oh god, Makoto couldn't be anything now. Why had she stopped to think that? She'd been doing so well up to now.

  
_'I'm glad you put up with us though, for all the reasons that I've said. Also, I've been trying to use these letters as an excuse to tell people things that will help them, but in your case it's hard to think of something. Other than that you should let other people do the work more, but that's more on them than it is on you. How do you manage to be so perfect? You'll have to teach me!_

_Only I guess you can't now. Haha, way for me to bring this letter down... Well, I can beat about the bush as much as I want, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm dying – or dead, I guess – and you all know that. It's not going to be easy for any of you, but I don't want you to be too upset over me. Or should I be saying that I don't want you to bottle up your feelings and act like you're not upset? It's hard to know what advice to give. But what I mean is that I hope you can heal in the time you need. And I know that in that you'll do just fine, Gou._

_Think of me when you need to, but don't always be sad when you think of me. Because I did a lot of things other than dying. I'm worth remembering. Which is something you should tell yourself as well. Gou... Sorry, Kou Matsuoka is always worth remembering._

_Okay, so I've just got off the phone to you. I've asked you to come pick up the letters from me tomorrow and you of course said yes. When you get here I'll give you instructions of which letter to send and when, though most of them will just be a case of shoving in the postbox a while after my funeral. Speaking of that, I'll pay you for the stamps as well. Thank you once again._

_I guess I should wrap this up now. Just make sure you take care and let other people look after you as much as you look after other people._

_I love you,_

_Makoto_

_P.S. When I wrote Momo's letter I included a note asking him to get off your case a little. Was that so wrong?'_

  
Gou leaned back on the chair, looked up at the ceiling and released the breath she'd been holding with a smile. It was over. She'd done what Makoto asked, posted the letters, read her own letter and now it was done.

“So you ready for that coffee before it gets cold?”

She looked over to find that Rin and Sousuke were both waiting in the doorway. Maybe she should have been mad at them for not giving her more time to read the letter on her own, but how could she feel even a little annoyed when she and Makoto had worked so hard to bring them all back together again? So she'd let this one slide.

“Yeah,” Gou replied, “And come in instead of lurking in the doorway, would you? We've all got a lot of talking to catch up on and I want to make up for lost time.”

“You don't have to tell me twice,” vowed Rin, motioning for Sousuke to follow him through.

And so for their small family, they were able to find peace about Makoto and life started to seem a little better again.


	8. Letter to Miho & Goro

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miho isn't allowed to read a letter she receives while she's on the clock and she forgets about it until after work, when she's talking to Goro. Though it turns out that the letter isn't only addressed to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that I said there'd be no romantic ships in this fic, but I hope you'll forgive me for a few vague Goro/Miho hints in this chapter.

“Miss Amakata, a reminder that you're here to work, not to check your mail.”

That comment was the reason that Miho had been irritated all day. Her superiors could be so annoying sometimes, especially since she knew for a fact that there were plenty of times when they'd be doing who-knew-what instead of working. By contrast, Miho was always a model (no references to previous jobs intended...) teacher who would rarely ever do anything out of line, at least if you asked her. It was just typical that the one time she had stopped to try and open a letter before the start of class, the principal walked by and caught her out.

Yet no matter how annoyed she got, there was no denying that she was in the wrong. So she refrained from checking the letter for the rest of the school day, which was partly because by lunch time she'd forgotten about it anyway and only remembered that she was irritated with the principal for some reason.

It took Goro asking why she was so annoyed when she stopped off at the ITSC Returns after work for her to remember the exact reason.

“So did you read it already?” he asked, as he lent on the mop he'd been using to clean up around the pool.

“No because... because as a famous author once said 'I have always believed in savouring the moment so that in the end we might have things',” Miho replied. She held up her index finger up as she recited the quote.

“Well, I guess you do still have the letter, so that must be true,” Goro agreed, though Miho couldn't help but wonder if he doubted the accuracy of her quote.

“I might as well read it now though, just in case it's important,” she said, taking it out of her bag, “It's such a nice colour and you rarely get handwritten letters any more. I don't think I've gotten any since... well, since a long time ago.”

They both knew that she meant back when she was working as a model, but Goro was still too scared of her wrath to bring it up, even when it was only the two of them. Which she appreciated. Though perhaps his reason for not saying anything about it might have had more to do with the fact that he was squinting at the address on the letter.

“Hey, that's got my name on as well,” he said.

“Does it?” Miho asked.

When she turned the envelope over to look at it she realised that he was right. It was addressed to both Miho Amakata and Goro Sasabe, even though it had been sent to Iwatobi High School. She hadn't thought to check who it was for because why would a letter be in her pile if it was for anyone other than her? But also, a member of staff must have seen it in order to put it there when checking through the school mail that morning. And if they'd seen Goro's name too then... maybe rumours would start to spread about her. She felt her face heat up with embarrassment.

“If no one's said anything then they probably didn't notice,” Goro suggested, seeming to guess at what her discomfort was about.

“I hope not... But you're probably right. Given how gossipy they can be on the school board I definitely would have heard something before the end of the day if they knew,” replied Miho, “Even so... why would someone address it like that? Do you think it was a practical joke?”

She had a few harsh quotes ready for practical jokers!

“You won't find out until you read it,” Goro suggested.

And he was right about that too. So Miho tore open the letter, still feeling annoyed about the double dose of inconvenience it might have caused her today. First of all when she got caught trying to open it to read this morning and now again with the address maybe causing rumours about her in her place of work. But as soon as she saw who the letter was from, her expression changed entirely. She suddenly felt awful.

“Oh no...”

“Hmm? Who's it from?” asked Goro, he was leaning forward enough now that he'd lose his balance against the mop handle if he wasn't careful.

“It's from Tachibana...” Miho said.

“Makoto? Really? That's... that's rough...” mumbled Goro.

“We have to read this, it's important,” Miho insisted.

Goro nodded in agreement. He left the mop leaning against the nearest wall, kicked out a wet floor sign over where he'd been cleaning (Miho wasn't even sure if you had to have those in pool after closing time, but better to be safe than sorry) and then the two of them made their way through to Goro's office so that they could read it properly.

Part of Miho wanted to say that she should read it first, since it had been sent to the school, but that wasn't fair, since it was equally addressed to both of them and Goro seemed just as eager to read it as she was. So when they sat down, she held up the letter between them so they could both read it and had to fight back her teacher's urge to read it out loud. This wasn't something she was sharing with the class, after all, it was something that had been written just for them.

  
_'Dear Miss Amakata and Coach Sasabe,_

_I'm writing this letter to both of you, because you're probably both going to be together when you read it. Maybe what I'm about to say will be upsetting, so it's better to have someone with you to talk about things when you're upset. That sounds like one of your quotes, Miss Amakata. Heh.'_

  
“So presumptuous...” Miho whispered.

“About us being together, us getting upset or what he said sounding like a quote?” Goro checked.

“All of them,” Miho insisted.

  
_'I want to say that I wouldn't be here today if not for the two of you, but that loses it's impact when the “here” I am right now is in a hospital bed and the “here” I'll be when the two of you read this is beneath the ground. But what I mean by that is the two of you gave me a passion for teaching that I carried with me until the day I died. Without Miss Amakata's support, the swim club would never have gotten off the ground, so I'd never have been able to carry on with my passion for swimming. And without Coach Sasabe, I both never would have gotten such a good start to swimming in the first place and then also never would have taken on the part time job that showed me teaching other people to swim was what I wanted to do with my life. I took my studies in university completely seriously and I want to believe that if I'd managed to see it through to the end then I would have become a swimming coach who'd have made both of you proud.'_

  
It turned out that Makoto wasn't wrong in his assumptions that his words would upset them. From that one paragraph alone Miho was struggling to keep holding the letter up, though she told herself that she had to keep going. Next to her she heard Goro sniff loudly.

  
_'What makes me feel so strongly about teaching is that you get to help so many people. I think of all those who I could have helped, who I now won't be able to help, and I feel sad. But maybe I shouldn't feel that way. After all, even if I only helped Hayato and the rest of his class, that's still a few people who now feel more confident about swimming because of me._

_And the other reason I shouldn't feel sad is because even if I can't help people, the two of you still can. You didn't just shape my life, you also did the same for Haru, Nagisa, Rei, Rin... and I'm sure many other people who I don't even know. And you're going to keep on doing that in future. That makes me feel much better. I know that I can depend on the two of you._

_So thank you. Thank you for all that you've both done for me and all that you're going to do for others. You're both wonderful and I'm glad I met you. A good teacher is what inspires others to do well. I was lucky to have two great teachers._

_I love you both,_

_Makoto'_

  
Miho lowered the letter. Then she lowered her head. And then she started crying. Soft, quiet sobs... When Goro put his arm around her and pulled her close she didn't object. They must both be feeling the same sorrow right now.

“He was... such a good student... He would have made a great teacher someday...” she mumbled, looking over at Goro with tears in her eyes, “...He didn't deserve this...”

“No one does. But yeah, especially not someone like him,” said Goro. He sighed, “He would have made it, you know? He really cared about helping others and everyone liked him. You saw how many there were at the funeral. People just... appreciated that boy.”

“The more you open your heart to others, the more your heart grows...” Miho added, “Actually, I think that quote might have been a warning about what happens if you close your heart, but I changed it so it worked better for Tachibana...” It was rare that she'd ever admit to her quotes being anything less than accurate.

“You always make them sound better anyway,” Goro assured her, “Because you're so sincere, just like Makoto was.”

“He didn't learn that from me. He was always like that,” replied Miho, as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Some people are just born with it, I guess. But no matter where it comes from, he was a good guy and we'll all miss him,” Goro said, “And I know that I'm going to keep on doing this for his sake.”

“You'll keep doing it because it's what you're meant to do,” Miho told him.

“Is that a quote from somewhere?”

“Just from me.”

They looked across at each other and despite everything, they smiled. What happened with Makoto was tragic and would stick with them both for a long time to come. But Makoto knew that he wasn't the only person in the world. They had other students to teach, students who had the potential to become just as brilliant as Makoto. And none of those students would be disregarded as long as the two of them were able to teach them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the actual quotes that Miho was trying to reference but messed up on, for anyone who might be interested:
> 
> “I've always believed in savouring the moments. In the end, they are the only things we'll have.” - Anna Godbersen
> 
> “The less you open your heart to others, the more your heart suffers.” - Deepak Chopra


	9. Letter to Rei

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rei might not approach life in a manner that Makoto can predict, but that doesn't stop Makoto from offering him words of praise, advice and comfort all the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this chapter the next one is Haru's, which will be the last. Hope you're all more ready than I am.

Rei wished that his brother could have given him the letter sooner, but then he supposed that it was his own fault for not checking if there'd been anything for him when the mail arrived. He hadn't been up to doing anything much lately, not if he could avoid it. He was still... doing things, going about his daily tasks, because he knew that if he stopped for too long then he'd be overwhelmed by it all, but there was none of his usual passion to any of his actions. Everything Rei did right now was going through the motions and today's motions hadn't involved checking the mail until early afternoon.

And his reason for doing so was a strange one. He'd received a phone call from an old friend, seemingly out of nowhere. At first Rei presumed that the call would be from Nagisa and he felt a pang of guilt for having turned him down so many times since... since Makoto's passing. But given that Rei was hardly up to anything at all right now, hanging out with friends was beyond him. However, hearing from Asahi after so long had been enough of a surprise to pull him back from his sadness, at least for a little while.

Asahi had said that he'd gotten a letter and then asked Rei if he'd got one too. When Rei admitted that he hadn't checked, Asahi all but demanded that he go see if he had one and then call him back after reading the letter, if he was up to it. What sort of letter was Asahi expecting him to get that would render him unable to call back after reading it? Rei's life was already feeling that bad at the moment, so he didn't need the help of any letters to make him feel wore.

He'd probably jinxed himself by thinking that.

Because where Rei was right now, was sat in the living room with a green envelope on his lap. He knew who it was from. Because Rei knew more about aesthetic than any of his other friends, he'd wager, and that shade of green had Makoto written all over it. Not to mention the fact that Makoto's name was written right there on the return address, like a warning.

It was almost laughable, in a morbid way, that such a return address was present. If Rei sent it back, not that he would, but if he did, there'd be no way for the letter to ever get back to Makoto. Not where he'd gone. Rei buried his face in his hands and wished that his mind didn't work that way, that he didn't think of such things. Because he knew that he was only thinking that way to avoid having to read the letter itself. Was he that much of a coward...?

No. No, he wasn't. Not Rei Ryugazaki. Not any more. He hadn't gone through everything he had done in the swim club to turn away from one of his friends. Especially not a friend who'd done so much for him. He had to read Makoto's letter, there was no question about it.

He raised his head again and then got up from where he was sat and went through to the kitchen. In there, he steamed the envelope open. Perhaps a little weird, but Rei felt that it would be wrong to damage something from Makoto in any way and he couldn't bear to see ugly rips in the envelope. Though in the usual Rei fashion, his method ended up working against him and the steam caused some of the writing on the letter inside to distort slightly. Not enough so that it was unreadable, but enough so that Makoto's beautiful handwriting became fuzzy around the edges in that part of the letter. Rei bit his lip, cursed his stupidity, and took the letter back through to the living room.

There was no point in getting worked up when the damage was already done. He had to read the letter. So he composed himself as best he could, adjusted his glasses and made a start.

  
_'Hey Rei,_

_These are probably going to be the last words that I say to you. Or at least the last words that you read from me. Because I hope that between writing this letter and, well, the big day, that I get to see you in person a few more times. In fact, I have no doubts that I will. You've been so diligent about coming to visit each day. No matter the weather or other obligations you might have, I can always expect to see you at the same time, just like clockwork. You're a very reliable friend and I know that this isn't the first time someone's told you that._

_When I think about the two of us as friends, I can't help but admire how far we've come. It's strange to think that if it hadn't been for Nagisa relentlessly pestering you to join the swim club then the two of us might not even know each other. Yet now I consider you to be one of my closest friends. So I look back on that time in high school and feel that I'm very lucky. But also that you're very lucky to have met us as well. Even if it was difficult at first and there were times when we maybe didn't make the best choices as your friends, you stuck with it – you didn't give up when you couldn't swim, not until you learned. And you also knew when to step back and put others before you. I'll never forget what you did for Rin that day and I doubt he will either._

_I felt sad when I had to leave you and Nagisa behind to go to Tokyo, but I never for a moment doubted that the swim club would be in good hands. Each time I'd come back home and the two of you would tell me all your stories about how things were going I'd feel proud of you both.'_

  
At one point, receiving such compliments from Makoto would have made both Rei's heart and head swell with pride. But right now it just made everything seem all the more empty...

  
_'How are you taking my death, I wonder? With some people like Rin and Nagisa I have clear answers. But with you, you're such a wild card. Even if you might not think of yourself as such. I could equally see you shutting yourself off as I could you trying hard to act as if it's all fine. Maybe you're doing both at the same time. Rei is a very multi-tasking person._

_But however you're taking it, know that the others still need you. Nagisa will shut down if he has no one to distract him from his sorrows, Haru will drift away and Rin will lash out. But I know that you can help all of those people in your unique Rei way. But that oddly leads me to the next thing that I wanted to say to you – even if you do want to help everyone, don't let yourself get overwhelmed by it all. Take it one step at a time. If Nagisa or Rin or anyone else call you then go to them, but walk, don't run. And while Haru won't call, if you do choose to go to him, make sure that you're fully prepared for it first. Because if you go in without being ready then maybe you'll say the wrong thing and regret it later._

_Though maybe I'm worrying about nothing. Rei has a big heart, so I'm sure that Haru and everyone else will open up to you no matter what you say. No one should ask anything of you except that you be yourself. Because that's the best you can be._

_Do I sound cheesy? Are you shaking your head at how awful my advice is?'_

  
Oh Makoto...

Rei had to lift up his glasses to wipe the tears away from his eyes. He didn't think that Makoto sounded cheesy at all, nor that his advice was awful. By contrast it was exactly Rei needed to hear.

  
_'Anyway, I should let you go. No doubt you have a busy day ahead of you. Please do call Nagisa, if you do one thing for me today. Because he'll need you there now more than ever._

_And also, if you ever doubt yourself, just remember that I believe in your actions and that has to count for something, right? Just... don't go robbing a bank or something and think that I believed in you, not that you'd ever do that. I know that Rei always does what's right and if there is a Heaven that you'll get in there with flying colours and then probably teach them a thing or two about how to do it right._

_Thank you for being my friend and giving all of us a chance._

_I love you,_

_Makoto'_

  
...That was it. That was the whole letter. Not any less brilliant, even with Rei's mistake causing some of the words to blur a little. He assumed that Makoto wouldn't have known he would have done that, but it sounded as if, even if Makoto didn't know all of what Rei would do, that he knew Rei would do the right thing. Sometimes he just took a different route to others to get there.

He could have sat there for a lot longer reflecting on what he'd read, but Makoto's words had inspired him for action. So he instead went and called Asahi back, arranged to meet up with him tomorrow, and then called Nagisa to ask him to join. Makoto would be happy to know that Rei was introducing Nagisa to his old friend and that apparently Asahi was also bringing a friend along to introduce to them. That way everyone's circle of friends would get a little bigger and they'd all be there for each other.

With tomorrow sorted, Rei decided that he'd go out for a jog. Because if he was going to think about Makoto, why did he have to do it at the house? It was a beautiful day outside, in a beautiful world that now had to try harder to be even more beautiful, because the most beautiful person who had been in it was now gone.

So Rei got changed into his jogging gear and headed out of the door, giving everything he passed a greater appreciation than he'd been able to for a long while. There were the cats that lay out the quiet streets, the flower stall with the lovely arrangements, the birds say up on the telephone wires – all of it was lovely.

As he ran, Rei passed a juice bar, where he saw Nitori and Momo sat together, talking cheerfully. Maybe they'd also received letters that had changed their outlooks, but Rei didn't stop to ask them today. Instead he just waved and they waved back. Slightly further on he also saw Seijuro, who had an apartment nearby, he was jogging as well and even offered to give Rei a race some other day, because apparently right now he had too much thinking to do. Rei assured him that he wasn't the only one.

But more noticeable than anyone else, when Rei was running near the seafront he saw... Haru.

All the good feelings in the world couldn't stop Rei's stomach from lurching at the sight. None of them had seen Haru at all since the funeral. They couldn't... get him to leave Makoto's grave that day. He'd just stood there no matter what anyone had said. Rei's last memory of the funeral was walking away with the others and looking back on Haru, stood alone as the evening rolled in...

The stance he had now, as he stood in front of the sea, was exactly the same as the one he'd had when he was at the grave. It was as if someone had copied Haru out of that day and pasted him into this one.

Rei should go to him. That was the right thing to do.

...Yet as he turned to make his way down there, he saw something that made him hesitate. Another person was already making their way over to Haru and they were much closer than Rei was. Rei watched as they got there and then Haru turned to talk to them.

Suddenly it felt wrong to intrude.

And Makoto had told him that he should be properly prepared before talking to Haru, which right now he wasn't. Not at all. Maybe it was best to leave Haru in the hands of that other person, just for now. Then tomorrow maybe Rei and Nagisa could go together to get him, so they could take him to see Asahi with them.

With that decision made, Rei wished the person talking to Haru luck and then jogged on in his quest to appreciate the beautiful world for Makoto.


	10. Letter to Haru

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final letter sits unopened in Haru's home, with him not there to open it. Instead he stares out at the sea, without Makoto and never with Makoto again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, the final chapter. Thank you so sticking with me on this emotional journey. I know that the Haru chapter has been the one that people have been the most eager for, so I hope this lives up to your expectations. For me, even though this story has been a short one, it's been a great chance for me to practise letter writing in fiction and also showing many different types of characters dealing with grief. If you want to see more of my Free! fanfics then I have plenty of oneshots for various ships and also another ongoing multi-chapter called Trail Mix, which is a zombie AU. Makoto's actually alive in that one and doing a decent job of staying that way. Anyway once again, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy.

There was one letter that Gou hadn't sent out when she'd posted the others. No doubt she would have wondered where it was, especially that letter of all letters, which was why Makoto had made sure to tell her not to worry about it. That letter was taken care of. If Makoto could only deliver one letter himself then it had to be that one.

In the last few days, when there was no point to him staying in the hospital any longer, Makoto's family had brought him home. They'd all but demanded to and Makoto privately felt glad to hear them be so forceful on the matter. Because right now, more than anything else he just wanted to be at home with them, instead of in the hospital bed that had housed him for too long.

When he was brought back home, he waited until no one was around, which took a long time, since everyone wanted to spend as much time as possible with him while they still could. But he finally got his moment and used what was left of his rapidly diminishing strength to make his way over to Haru's house...

It wouldn't have been the first time he'd let himself in, but it definitely was the last.

Makoto decided that his actions were worth it, even if his parents scolded him for it when he got home and Haru scolded him further when he found out. He had to take the letter to Haru's house and leave it there, in a place that he knew it would stay for a long time...

On the day that everyone else was receiving their letters, the one that Makoto had taken to Haru's house was still sat there on a side-table in his room. It remained unopened and how long it would stay that way was uncertain.

The letter read as followed.

  
_'Haruka,_

_...Yes, I'm starting this letter with that. I'm dead, so it's not as if you can stop me calling you by you full name one final time. Let me have that much at least, even if it makes you annoyed._

_I'm done writing all of the letters to everyone else. You're my last. Which seems fitting, given that you were my first in so many senses – my first friend, my first love, my first heartbreak and you'll be the last in all of those categories as well. You already know that and don't need me to tell you._

_I know for a fact that you won't read this letter for a long time, maybe even years to come. Because it's just going to be too hard for you. Maybe when you're 50 years old you'll finally sit down and open it up. I'm just sorry that if that's the case then it's probably been on your mind for all those years. But then again, I can't blame myself for how you act – that was the hardest lesson for me to learn in life. Although I feel that we both benefited from it when I did. The knowledge made us stronger._

_We took each other for granted for too long, didn't we? For a while I was thrilled that I knew you so well that I felt that we could understand each other without needing words. But in the end that was almost our downfall. Because no matter how well you know someone, talking is important. I will treasure every conversation we've had with each other, even the ones that are lost to forgotten memories that have drifted away from us both._

_I suppose I should tell you what I'm doing, because I've been dying (haha, yeah...) to tell someone. I'll be telling Gou when she comes to pick up the rest of the letters, but I feel like it'd be only right to tell you as well._

_You've probably guessed this already, but I've written letters to many of our friends. Some of them were harder to write than others, because it turned out there were many people who I didn't know as well as I'd have liked. But I want to believe that in each case I've managed to write something meaningful to every person, something that might help them. Because for too long I've been lying here, not able to do anything, while other people try to help me. So I want to do something to give back to my friends while I can. I've always wanted to help people, more than anything... But now I can't do that by being a teacher. This is all I can do..._

_Fuck. I already had a break down when I was writing Rin's letter, so I can't do it again in this one, even if you'll understand. Honestly, part of me thought about rewriting Rin's letter entirely after that, but I think the raw emotion will feel more real for him. Different people need different words to help them. Though I'd be the first to say that you probably understand Rin a lot better than I do, so I hope you think I've made the right choice._

_And speaking of understanding... I'm sorry. I'm sorry for how badly you'll be taking my death. I'm sorry for every moment you feel a hole inside your chest, feel as if you're incomplete, feel as if you have no idea how you're going to face the world. Because if this was the other way around then I know that'd be how I'd feel. Maybe we stifled each other too much and now you're the one having to suffer the consequences for us acting like two halves of a whole person._

_But you won't join me until it happens at its own time. I know you won't. That's not your way. What you'll do instead is pick yourself back up, learn to carry on and then become the best person that you possibly can be. I already know that you'll figure this out on your own, which is why I don't feel so bad if you don't read this letter for a long time._

_Even if you can learn to manage on your own though, I hope that you don't push others away. You already saw the dangers that can come of doing that back in middle school. Even if you're a strong person, no one can manage entirely on their own._

_Which is why I've sent some of our friends out after you in the other letters I've written. You're welcome. Don't worry though, I've tried to stagger them a little so that you don't get overwhelmed by everyone turning up at once. And I've told others that you'll come to them first, because I know that you will. When you've had time to heal and someone to talk to, you'll see that it's time to go to everyone else as well. And then you'll get better. I know that they'll all look after you. I know that you'll be in many good hands, not just mine. I also know that you'll look after them as well, because that's always what you wanted. You're dependable Haru, as much a part of Iwatobi as the beach or the school or the sea..._

_Okay, I took a little break from writing there, because it can get too much. My hand hurts and my emotions are curled up in a corner sobbing._

_If I was to start to thank you for all you've done then I'd never stop. Just like if I was to start to tell you off for all you've done then I'd never stop either. There's so much Haru to take into account. Not good or bad, just Haru. Being the only Haru you know how to be._

_But even if it'd take too long to thank you for everything, I wanted to thank you for walking between the ocean and me all those times. I knew you were doing it. Even if you didn't say. Your actions speak much louder than your words. Even when I started to get better about the ocean, I appreciated you doing that for me. You were always protecting me in the small ways that other people might not even think of._

_And I also wanted to thank you for letting me go. Look, I know you came with me to Tokyo, but that's not what I mean. You let go of my hand so that I could study, because you knew how much it meant to me. I know it wasn't easy for us and that must have been the roughest patch of our relationship when I told you I was leaving, but after so long something had to give and I feel that we both grew into stronger people because of it._

_If I had become a teacher then I know you'd have been at my side, supporting me all the way._

_Then what would have come next for us? Would we have come back to Iwatobi together? Would you have gone on to the Olympics while I joined Coach Sasabe and became a swim teacher? Or heck, maybe you'd have decided to open up your own restaurant instead. I know that you secretly had a dream about that. Heh..._

_It's wrong for me to think about the future we can never have though, isn't it? Instead I should be thinking about the future you might have without me. Only doing that's wrong as well, because Haru's future is in no one's hands but his own. Though whatever you do, I hope that you have many people around you to support you all the way. No, I don't hope, I know that you will. Everyone will stick with Haru._

_And if you find love again one day, then save me a seat at your wedding, all right? Or at least save me a slice of the cake. Make sure it's a chocolate cake. Would you even get married? I don't know, to be honest. Guess I don't know everything about you. But no matter what you do and who it's with, I know that when you open your heart like that to someone else again that it'll be the right person and they'll love you as much as anyone can._

_Have I talked for too long? I want to talk for much longer. I want to talk forever to you. But I know that Gou will be here soon, so I have to bring this to a close._

_What can I say to you that I haven't already said before, either with my mouth or my eyes? The last words from Makoto to Haru should be meaningful, yet... it feels like too big of a burden for me. Should I say something heart-warming that'll stick with you forever or something silly that will make you smile. Something like “Please don't live off just mackerel and pineapple, Haru-chan!” Yes, I'm throwing in a Haru-chan as well. You can't stop me._

_No, the more I think about it the more I realise that nothing will be good enough. There's just too much of us to pin down to one final sentence. So I'll end by saying what I've been trying to say for this entire letter:_

_Good luck, Haru! You're going to need it._

_I love you..._

_I love you so much that it hurts,_

_-Makoto'_

  
...That was the final letter Makoto wrote as he lay in the hospital on the day he had accepted his fate.

***

Haru stood looking out at the sea, as if blaming it for everything. Not that he could, not really. Because Haru loved the sea, even if Makoto didn't. And anyway, Makoto had been getting much better about it as time went on... he was good at facing up to his fears.

The waves lapped at Haru's feet, as if pointing out to him that it hadn't been the sea that had taken Makoto away anyway. It was an entirely human reason that came down to the genetic lottery. It could have been as much anyone else as it was Makoto. But in that case, why had it been Makoto? What right did the universe have to pick him?

It just wasn't fair!

He curled his hands into fists and shut his eyes tight once again. Consumed by the emotions that threatened him whenever he thought about Makoto. As if he'd been thinking about anything else for one single second since Makoto's passing anyway! Even before that... From the moment that they'd first gotten the news. Of course Makoto had put on a brave face and said that maybe something could be done, but they both knew inside that it was already too far along by the time they found it. He was putting on a brave face for Haru's sake. And maybe... maybe if Haru had more faith then it could have worked...

...But there was no point in blaming his lack of faith. Not now. Not when he was living in a world without Makoto or his grandmother either.

...Maybe they'd keep each other company in the afterlife...

They would get on, they're two of the most amazing people Haru had ever met...

It was no good. He was still alone. Even if he went into the crowded market in town then he'd be alone as long as Makoto wasn't there. Which was part of the reason why he'd ended up here. If he was going to be alone, then it might as well be at a place where no Makoto, not even his spirit, would ever go. Haru didn't deserve his company right now.

He didn't deserve anyon-

“Haru! Hey, Haru!”

The swirl of emotions that had consumed him snapped back and left him. Someone was calling for him. He unclenched his fists, opened his eyes and let the anger ebb out of his being. Then he turned to look...

“I've found you! I just knew you'd be here...”

“How did you know?” Haru asked.

“Well... it's just that you're Haru. You like water. And this is the biggest water around, right?”

If it had been anyone else, then Haru might have gotten a much deeper answer than “big water”. Maybe if it had been Rin or Nagisa or Rei then they might have guessed that it was because of the ties that the ocean had to Makoto. Although perhaps they'd equally assume that Haru wouldn't come here for the same reason. But no, it hadn't been any of those people who'd found Haru that day.

It had been Kisumi.

“So anyway, I came over from Sano to see you,” Kisumi said.

“Why?” demanded Haru.

Go on, tell him it was because of Makoto. Ask him if he wanted to talk about it. Make him pick at the scab that was never going to heal. Just do it.

“Because it's been a while and I missed you? I wanted to go out with Haru today, to see a movie or just hang out at his house. Do I need more of a reason than that?” Kisumi challenged.

He hadn't mentioned Makoto. Even though Haru knew that the letters had been sent out and that was almost definitely what had prompted him to come here today. Even so, Haru appreciated that he wasn't going to make him talk about something he wasn't ready to.

“Thank you...” he whispered.

“Don't thank me until you've had a good time,” replied Kisumi, “Now come on, movies or home? Or... pool? I'd even do the pool for you, okay?”

“No. Let's do basketball today,” Haru answered.

“Come on! I know you don't want to,” Kisumi laughed.

“It isn't always about what I want. We can do basketball today and the pool tomorrow. Then we can do the movies the next time,” said Haru. Just like that he had plans. Plans with Kisumi...

“Sounds like a date to me. Or a few of them, I guess. I'll pencil you in on those other days and see what I can do,” hummed Kisumi, sounding like he barely believed that Haru was not only agreeing to this, but suggesting more.

“You'll fit me in. Hanging out with me is much better than whatever other plans you had,” Haru promised.

Kisumi looked at him and smiled; “Man, you're full of surprises. I wasn't expecting this at all.”

“In that case, we're even. I wasn't expecting you,” Haru admitted.

“Do you... mind that it's me?” Kisumi asked.

“I'm glad that it's you. Now let's go,” concluded Haru.

They turned and walked away together. It wasn't the ending that either of them had expected, but somehow Haru felt good about it. He would talk about Makoto when he was ready, maybe to Kisumi or maybe to someone else. But probably to Kisumi, if he was honest. However, right now he was glad to spend some time with someone who wasn't going to press the matter, thinking about something other than Makoto for the first time in far, far too long...

Whatever reason Makoto had picked out Kisumi for, it was a good one. And maybe if Kisumi had come here without being directly told to by Makoto then that was even better. Haru would ask him one day. But not today.

For today, they just walked together. And when Haru put his hand in Kisumi's, there were no objections to it.


End file.
